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2AM thoughts

It's 2AM. I couldn't sleep. I thought maybe using this time to write would be great. Hey, I'm up thinking about you. You're too hard on yourself. I'm sorry I couldn't get my thoughts through most of the time. You're the best thing that happened to me. Nothing but a great son and a caring brother, a great husband for putting myself above anything. With the expectations and the weight over your shoulder, It doesn't mean you couldn't take a break to give yourself some space. In a few days I'll be home, hoping that could ease your anxiety. No more falling, okay? One step at a time, my love. I'm sure you'll get there somehow. I have your back. You have my words.

4th August 2018

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We're finally married! I'm feeling ecstatic. And yes, the date was randomly picked... I married the most important man in my life. He prolly doesn't know that. It was about 8 years ago when we first met; Took us long enough to get here. I get it's not a race. We had our share of tough times. Ah, those times kept me going. Can't number them emotional fights we had. We grew up so much from then, innit? What I learned most over the years is to be his friend, and he, mine. We're still good friends now, but like, maybe better. Sometimes I space out when he's talking, cause I didn't want time to stop... I couldn't have asked a better person who understands me inside and out. Thank you for marrying me. This is the beginning of a new chapter for us. I'm not quite ready to leave it all behind yet, but I'm sure it will be fine as long as I have you. You're a pillow to my soul namsayin? We spent all of adulthood toge

Saturday morning

It's a foggy Saturday morning. I figured this is a good time to write. Not sipping coffee or anything. Past few months were full of surprises and a lot of confusion. You know, like the bad kind. If I start listing them down I'd come off as whiny. Meh, I'll pass. I constantly feel empty on the inside, not sure if it's discontentment or just feeling lonely. I'm betting on the latter. And with that, I've been lacking inspiration to write. Maybe I'm already dead on the inside. Hopefully I'll have something to say in few months time. Hopefully, it's something good this time.

This is for you

You fill in the hole in my heart. Maybe I was so used to losing all this time, You make feel like I'm winning for the first time. I've known it for awhile now; You're irreplaceable. And this is for you. I know you're at your lowest. I know you're thinking; "It's impossible to go on." Just remember, My hands are for you to hold. Don't fight this alone. No matter how rough things get, I will never give up on you. I know this because, Nobody can ever replace the loss If ever I lose you.

After You

What was happiness before you came? I find through rain and sad songs. After you, It's been sunshine and storm, But never alone. And I am grateful. The way your hand fits mine, The way our fingers intertwined; It was a steady hold. It was that storm that hit us, In ways we didn't think, We were naked; Unprepared. A hand that reaches out, Without a hand to hold; It was not long until it rains and sad songs. Now I stand alone again. Find me where it rains, I'd take the same road with you, Even for a thousand years, I'd do it all again. I'd still choose you.

Hopes and such

Being with you is like waking up to dawn at sea, Some days are like finding hair in your butt, While some days... Let's just say it's like being hit by tsunami. This is not a beautiful relationship. Like my life, I spend more time in a bad place than I do in a good place. Since it gets me where I am today, I wouldn't regret a thing. I got through bad days I got through good days But none of that without you. I don't spend so much time bragging about you (Which is fine) My friends probably think you're a bad partner, Or they would think we don't love each other; because I spend so much time gushing over hot celebs. Some days I admit, I want to tell the world how deeply grateful I am for you. I t's impossible to write down the things we went through but ok I am hoping If God is to give me bad news, He'll keep me being content, Just as I am now. I am hoping somehow, Somewhere among the stars, It is you written for me.

Chasing your dreams

I would avoid this topic at all cost when asked. But how long can you really run? Recently, I've been hit with questions and remarks that I find unpleasant to talk about. If you happen to know me personally, You'll understand what I mean. (Not that I like opening up) An old friend actually asked, "What are you planning to do with your life?" Then he continued, "Oh wait your job just reminded me you won't be able to do much." "I don't think you'll ever grow staying in that environment your whole life." "I guess you'll be stuck there for the rest of your life." There are a lot of things to consider before saying that: 1) You have money 2) You have money 3) You have a lot of money So why impose your life on other people when you know that not a lot of people can afford what you can? Personally, I've always been envious of the wealthy. They could practically buy their way thr